Angaladikibo, the Watcher of the Mangroves, took his favourite position in the Parliamentary Hall of the People of the Waterfronts. Angaladikibo’s mind can never be a conducive workshop for the devil. No it can never, because his mind has never been idle. If he is not discussing with anyone at any particular time, then his attention automatically shifts to the Mangroves. It was not for nothing that he was called the Watcher of the Mangroves. He has been so engrossed with the Mangroves that it was as if his life depends on them. In turn, the Mangroves reveal to him the shenanigans of the People of the City, a set of people that would not allow peace to reign in the City, extending to the Watersides, the Waterback and even to the Waterfronts.
In their ignorance, the People of City could not understand that there are communities at the Watersides, Waterback and Waterfronts. It has been their nature to confuse the three distinct communities. However, Angaladikibo has refused to be bothered anymore. He is of the Waterfronts community and whoever refuses to understand that and continues to lump his community with the others like the Watersides and the Waterback, has only himself to blame.
Angaladikibo, the Watcher of the Mangroves, took his favourite position, the seat beside the window. When he sits in that position, he could patiently wait for the appointed time to begin the deliberations. The entire waiting period would be filled with interactions with the Mangroves as he gazed at them. As usual, the Mangroves never fail to open up to him.
“Angaladikibo,” the Mangroves began to speak to him, “You must know that corruption has become the second nature of the People of the City. In the City, unlike the Waterfronts, it is not an offence to be corrupt, it is no sin. As a matter of fact, you would be like a fish out of the water, if you fail to be corrupt in the City. Friends desert you, relations abandon you, your church ignores you and your community rejects you. Of what use are you to them anyway? You cannot even donate in thousands, not to talk of millions of naira. How would your friends and relations gain from you? How would they gather around you and be filled with wine, women and food when you depend only on your paltry minimum wage of N18,000? Do you want your priests to starve? Do you want them to abandon the preaching of the gospel and go to the farms or go to the river to fish? How would your community develop in the absence of a caring government, when you cannot fete them now and then, splash money to take chieftaincy titles and donate generously during functions or even make your contributions regularly? So you see why corruption is encouraged in the City? It makes things move.
“It is not that there are no laws against corruption. Far from it. There are innumerable laws against corruption. Outsiders must not feel the People of City are lawless. However, embedded in the laws are inflections here and there, carefully hidden, but capable of letting loose anyone caught by the law, except he or she is a stupid poor person. After all, didn’t Ibori, the Ogidigborigbo of the Niger Delta go scot-free in the courts of the City, while the same set of accusations fetched him several years of imprisonment in faraway of lands? So, you must be careful in your criticism of the People the City. The fault is not in them, but in their stars! They were made in that form. You cannot take a corrupt rich man to the police, corruption is their uniform. You cannot take him to the courts, they will simply put a stamp of authority on him to go free. You cannot report him to the Honourable lawmakers, they will simply tighten any loose end of the law capable of indicting him and declare him innocent. You cannot present him to the executives, I mean, the government, the real authority, as they would simply turn you, the complainant, to the accused. If you doubt what we are telling you, go and ask one of them, a former President, General Olusegun Obasanjo. He told them to their face.”
The Oldman of the Waterfronts got up. The appointed time has come, the ancestors have to be appeased and the deliberations must commence. It is a weekly ritual adopted by the People of the Waterfronts to drill a little bit of orderliness into the heads of the People of the City. He stretched his left hand and picked up the bottle of the local white brew. His right hand picked up the little glass cup, permanent companion of the bottle of the local white brew, he filled it and began his call on the ancestors.
“Odumodu, great ancestor of the People of the Waterfronts, he who makes his presence felt at every promontory to the People of the Waterfronts, another day has presented itself to be accounted for. We mere mortals can do nothing except you guide and lead us. Take, Odumodu, drink and assist us in this our onerous task of picking up sense in the senseless acts of the People of the City.
“Otumo-Ogugu, Favourite of the Maidens, he who goes in and out of the Maidens, detecting the unfaithful ones, we call on you to assist us also. Take, Otumo-Ogugum drink and guide us.
“Osokolo, another Favourite of the Maidens, he who pursues the Maidens out of the Waterfronts, reminding them of their domestic chores, we are nothing without you, our ancestors. Your roving eyes should never be kept away from us. Take, Osokolo, drink and join your co-ancestors to assist us.”
The Oldman of the Waterfronts allowed the bottle of the local white brew and the little glass cup to go round, after he has gulped a glassful. Why all the ancestors should share a glassful while human beings take a glassful each, is a mystery no one has been able to unravel.
It was Injibabo, the Fisherman of the Waterfronts, that got up to speak immediately the bottle of the local white brew and the little glass cup returned to the table.
“People of the Waterfronts, I greet you. I cannot help but marvel at the ways of the People of the Waterfronts. Of a truth, their ways passeth all understanding. The other day, I went to the City with my little boat. You know how the City is whenever it rains. I did not want to take a chance and so I had to paddle my little canoe to the City. What I saw was a surprise. Believe me, People of the Waterfronts, the People of the City are mysterious people. Only our ancestors could understand their ways. With these my two eyes, I saw old or should I say ancient people demonstrating on the streets of the City. Believe me, I saw it. They were not demonstrating a new type of break-dance or gymnastic acts they have acquired. Some of them were 65 years of age, some 70 years, some 80 and some well over that. Some could not even stand erect and yet they were out on the streets of the City demonstrating. Very strange. What were they demonstrating for? You will not believe it, they were all pensioners pleading to the government to pay their outstanding entitlements.
“People of the Waterfronts, I was shocked that such ancient men and women who put in the better part of their lives to make the City what it is today, most of them putting in over 35 years of active service, were denied their legal entitlements. The funny part of it is that some were just entitled to what you would regard as peanuts, after spending the better parts of their lives, serving. Most of them have no house of their own, no cars or even alternative means of livelihood. I was so stupefied in wonder of it that I nearly rammed my little boat against a building, like the Dana plane that left its airspace and landed on buildings.
“People of the Waterfronts, I know you will wonder why I was so shocked at the site of the Oldman demonstrating for pittance. However, I know you have not forgotten the funny law enacted by the Honourable men and women of the Rivers State House of Assembly. The House of Assembly of the State has passed a bill which has been signed into law by the State Governor, Rt. Hon. Chibuike Rotimi Amaechi. The Act stipulates that the governor and others before him, for working for four or eight years as government officials, will be provided with two houses in places of their choice in Abuja and in the state. Three cars would be provided for them and be replaced every three years; they will also receive 300 percent for furniture of their choice. That is not all, they have 20 percent funding for utility, 10 percent funding for entertainment. Again, the state will give to these special citizens, free medical expenses for them and their immediate family, security service details that will entail two officials of the state security services, one female officer of the same department, eight police officers for personal and domestic security, a cook, steward, gardener and others. Odumodu! This law is enacted in a state that could not pay pensioners who worked for several years, their paltry allowances. Meanwhile, these governors have several houses, several cars, and several companies and money stacked for their use. This type of funny law was exactly what moved Frederic Bastiat to say, “The law perverted! And the police powers of the state perverted along with it! The law, I say, not only turned from its proper purpose but made to follow an entirely contrary purpose! The law becomes the weapon of every kind of greed! Instead of checking crime, the law itself guilty of the evils it is supposed to punish! If this is true, it is a serious fact, and moral duty requires me to call the attention of my fellow-citizens to it.”
“Odumodu, you are the only one that can help us from these People of the City. Grandpa, my throat is dry.”
The Oldman of the Waterfronts filled the little glass cup, cleared his throat with it before sending the bottle of the local white brew and the little glass cup round. ####
previous post
