As I worked out of the Court Hall of Honourable Justice R.I Ahiakwo with Barrister B.E. Mbea to meet K. Sigalo Esq. who was in the Federal High Court, 3 in our matter we stood down, the thought of the title of my next article struck me. I went to the news stand to see whether the current or latest edition of the National Network was out and I saw that that edition was focused on U.S.T Convocation and Professor B.B. Fakae with all exactitude. Disappointed, I rejoined Mbea Esq. and continued our journey on foot to the Federal High Court which of course is a whispering distance from the State High Court whereat we had our 1st matter that Thursday, May 3rd. If those who constructed the fence of the state or Federal High Courts were human enough they would have opened a back or exit gate or conjunctive gate in between the fence so that Lawyers or even litigants could take advantage of it to ferry the two courts without the stress of footing one’s way through the main road which is like the journey of the children of Israel, passing through a distant red sea, Jordan and the long wilderness to go to a stone’s throw distance of Canaan.
The fence in-between the Federal High Court and that of the State High Court in this city of Port Harcourt indicates to me that there is no love lust between the Federal and State government. What are they quarrelling over?
And the N.B.A, Port Harcourt does not see the need for this small gate to help Lawyers and litigants.
Back to our journey to the Federal High Court. As soon as we started walking on the pedestrian lane of the road to the Federal High Court (station road) my straying eyes quickly captured a very massively big goat boldly approaching us, heading towards the State High Court where we were coming from as if it had a case in the Federal High Court and now going to the State High Court for its own case too. I took time to watch the goat elegantly moving towards us. The goat is so big that I assumed it has more than triplets caged in its womb. I took my camera phone and took a snapshot of the bold goat. It stopped to respond to the snapshot as if to pose for the camera. Other Lawyers and passers-by either smiled or laughed when the goat posed for the photograph. Port Harcourt goat; that was exactly what my thought revealed to me. I quickly told Barrister Mbea that I have got the title for my next article! “PORT HARCOURT GOAT”.
Exactly, that is it. What else should the goat be named? We have heard Stone Cold or Julius Agwu sing “PORT HARCOURT GIRL”. Duncan Mighty’s fame is only second to Boko Haram in this country with his hit track of “PORT HARCOURT BOYS”. The only one we have not got is “Port Harcourt Animal” or “Port Harcourt Goat”
Don’t you think we have Port Harcourt Goats in the city? Why then have we kept this criminal silence to sing or write about them? I am not a singer or artist but a chronic writer, so I do my work to expose the Port Harcourt Goats.
There is no gainsaying that all these goats you see on the streets of Port Harcourt are city goats. They behave far better than some of the residents of this town or city. They do not behave like village or Local goats.
A Port Harcourt goat knows when to cross the busy roads of the city. A Port Harcourt goat does not deficate anyhow on the main road to be in tandem with the spirit of keeping the city clean. The Port Harcourt goat I saw that day knew it was passing through the vicinity of the Court and so did not shout or make noise like a village goat. It kept its silence and observed the rules of absolute silence.
A Port Harcourt goat has not been arrested by TIMA RIV, police or any other uniform people (as Port Harcourt is now buffeted with the presence of too many uniform people-both recognized or fake). I have seen some Port Harcourt or city goats previously in the late 1990s when I was running my Diploma Programme in the Rivers State College of Arts and Science, Port Harcourt and living in St. John’s Campus of the Rivers State College of Education then. They were Oroworukwo or Rumuokalagbor goats. They knew when to go to the market or how to go to the market, where or how to go to the market, where or how and when to cross the dualized and ever busy Aba/Port Harcourt Road without endangering their lives or other road user’s lives. They would not make trouble or misconduct themselves. That is Port Harcourt goat.
Late Fela Anikulapo Kuti in one of his tracks said “Doctor wey dey behave like Lawyer na soegba”.
I know without being told that these Port Harcourt goats behave far better than some residents of this city. The way some human beings behave on the roads in the city has defiled the wickedness of TIMA-RIV and corrupt propensity of the Nigeria Police Force combined.
Think of a way to make things work in this city and these people will work out a modality to frustrate your good efforts and intentions.
In Port Harcourt city human beings have bequeathed good morals and good manners to Port Harcourt goats or animals. Civilization and civil conduct are now deposited on the dunghills where goats have gone to pick them in the course of grazing. Goats now behave like humans and humans like goats. The way people cross the high ways only shows that they are on a suicide mission.
The way some drivers or motorists drive suggests that they need thorough psychiatric examination. The way we liter garbages in the city, behave at functions displays a hidden mixture of animal mentality in our thinking faculty. The way Port Harcourt residents park their cars is terrible. Thank God for the Port Harcourt Police aka TIMA-RIV. Yet the TIMA-RIV are also products of this insensitivity. They are adorning in that uniform only to keep poverty and unemployment at bay. True, this TIMA-RIV is one of the greatest mistakes of this administration as they have constituted themselves as both environmental and social nuisance in the streets. I am still wondering or pondering whether TIMA-RIV is not bereft of the requisite knowledge of their exact functions or whether they are not carried away by the euphoria of a new uniform and power to force or harass and/or torture innocent road users. My brother, there is power in uniform in this country. The police is even afraid of TIMA-RIV. The TIMA-RIV pretend not to collect money but they move some steps away from the peeping eyes of the Black Police and collect to survive. But police has no sense; they will even collect in the convoy of a Governor. Gaskiya, with respect, Nigeria police force is a curse. Forgive me if I am harsh. One was about to fight me if not for the intervention of my senior friend, Prof. M. Nyienakuma. My crime was that I politely told him that he parked his Jetta wrongly behind my car and I could not move either front nor turn as another car was also closely parked in front of mine.
Politicians too behave like goats. They are the “Zombies” that Late Music Icon, Fela Anikulapo Kuti sang about. Legislators are rubber stamps, surrogates and stooges in the hands of the Executors. They are “Yes sir, Legislators”.
They can kill their mothers if the Executors ask or order them to.
They convene to argue non-sense, legislate to suffer the people. Increase Tax regime, duplicate functions by creating multiple agencies, commissions and directorates to put food on the table of their cronies and girlfriends, while the masses suffer in penury.
As some of us struggle to be remembered when the ink of our pen gets dried and our hands get weak to write, to reshape the society our politicians think of how to enthrone corruption, siphoning public wealth into their family empires so that even after they have held offices public fund still service them and their families and even though the poor continue to die in poverty they don’t care.
Do you call that good governance? Why is a Port Harcourt goat so civilized than Port Harcourt men? Why are Port Harcourt men so heartless in Policy formulation, implementation or operation? Why? Perhaps we need to consult these Port Harcourt goats to re-direct our mind sets in this state. The truth is that many things are going wrong in this state and animals are now taking the places of men, and vice versa.
Barr. Gideon Kpoobari Girigiri
08036784327
